It.

So, Erin tagged me, and I'm supposed to list "6 quirky things" about me. I feel a little bad about this, because I'm already a tag behind from Teach. But I decided, with Teach's tag, that I was only going to respond to tags from thenceforth with photos. But I'm too lazy, or not creative enough, to do that. So. Here we are.

I'm the least quirky person I know. That sound you hear is the laughter of all my friends.

• I hate lotion. I'm not being pithy, that my taggee (zat a word?) proclaims herself compulsive. I hate it. I hate the greasy, oily, liquidy feel of lotion. It, like, sticks to my hands and stuff. My aversion means that I generally sunburn because I won't wear the stuff. (I use the spray stuff, which is like lacquer, when I'm on my bike). I have zero sense of "dry skin", or anything like that. Probably my skin is miserable, I wouldn't know.

• What's stronger than hate? I'd use that word to describe my feelings for mayonnaise. I'd prefer it not be in the room. Once, in college, I worked at Musicland. Anybody remember Musicland? Anyway, often after word I'd drive through Hardee's. Anybody remember Hardee's? Anyway, they had this really good burger, but it had mayo on it. And time and time and time again I'd order it without mayo, and then they'd slather it on anyway. The worst is when you drive through somewhere, maybe on the interstate or something, and you get your stuff and get back on the road, and then discover they've poisoned your food. Aaaaanyway, after the gillionth time of them putting mayo on my burger, I put it in a box and mailed it to Hardee's World Headquarters, so it would be super nasty and rancid when it got there, with a note that said, "Did you order this? Me neither."

• There are foods that I eat nonetheless that I understand have this poison in it. Ranch dressing. Certain sauces that I like. I'm aware. Probably, if I ever actually saw the stuff going into the recipe when it was made, a big spoonful of misery, I'd not eat it. As it is, it's just understood that this is not to be discussed, and I choose to pretend it isn't so.

• I am, in many things, exacting to the point of inefficiency. A good example of this is my handlebar tape. If it's not perfect - if there's a weird snag, or it's wrapped poorly in a place, or if, say, the winding is spaced differently between the left and right bars, I'll redo the whole damn thing. Because it'll bug me. And I try to say, "Ah, it's fine, who cares", but I know that I'll be out there on my bike and it'll be pissing me off because it's not just right. This applies, of course, elsewhere in my universe. God bless my wife.

• I'm utterly unadventurous when it comes to food and drink. If we go somewhere, I'll order a version of something I've had before. I'm hesitant to try any ethnic food, because I figure "if I'm going to go out to eat, I might as well make it somewhere I enjoy, no?" I prefer Miller Lite in a bottle as my standard beverage. I don't think about food much past just the eating - the experience of it eludes me. That said, I really do enjoy the Food Network, and shows like Iron Chef. People that are that interested in food - as an experience, or ritual, or something to be explored and not just devoured, I find fascinating.

• Sometimes - occasionally at, like, midnight - I'll have sudden, random, sad thoughts about my dog Jack. And sometimes I will literally begin sobbing for those thoughts, and I'll go get him from wherever he is so that he can sleep with me in my bed. He's the size of a small horse, so it makes for an uncomfortable night's sleep. But a happy one.

Postscript:

• This would have been funnier if my wife would have written it. I should have done that.

• I'm hesitant to say this, lest anyone feels bad or something, but another quirk: my superhero name? It's xt4. not Xt4, or XT4. It's okay if that's how you want to roll with it, but just so you know, I don't think of myself capitalized.

• I like the smell of my dog's feet, too.

So let's see. Alili, Kodafit, Iris, Borsch, and RobbyB, you're it. Or, not, however you want to roll.